Posted on Jul 04, 2007 08:11 am
glnflwrs
Head Knocker
Contributor Since: May 20, 2007
Earlier today, July 3, a friend and I went to an Albertson's market for Pepsi, beer, smokes, etc. He is the son of my best friend and is only 33.
We were in line to checkout and two lines over was a young lady in shorts that looked like they were painted on. She was approx. 5'-5", maybe 25 yrs old, and her legs went all the way to the ground. VERY nice on the eyes. I stepped close to my buddy and said, "Ya' know, her legs go right up and make an a$$ out of themselves" in a whisper. He looked at her and then me and whispered to me, "OK Chester the Molestor, calm down now".
Well, I then noticed the lady in line ahead of us and she is glaring at me and Robert, like she had heard our little comments. She is maybe 40ish.
She leaves, we checkout, and we go out, get in my truck, and drive off.
As soon as I left the parking lot and was on the street, I was lit up by one of San Bernardino County's deputies. I pulled over, he came to the window and said, "Well guys, I guess your plans just didn't pan out, did they?"
I said, "I beg your pardon, sir..." He said, I just ruined your little party , eh?"
I said, "Uhh, sir, I don't know what you mean, there's no party.."
"The cute chick in the store, you know" he said. I said, "No, I don't know, what do you mean?"
"Weren't you two discussing following a chick in shorts and molesting her while you were in the store?" I thought a second and it all came together. The 40ish biddy thaught Robert had said "Chase her and molest her," instead of Chester the Molestor. She had seen the cop in the parking lot and pointed us out to him.
I struggled to keep from bustin' out in guffaws, and told the deputy the real, exact content of our remarks about the chick. He looked at both of us, then kinda' stared down the street a minute, and said, "I'll go for that. It sounds more likely than the other story I got about you two..."
He handed me my license, and said, "You two be careful now, there are dangerous women about."
We drove off, and he u-turned and disappeared. Neither of us laughed until we got back to my house.
It could have had a VERY different outcome.
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