Apr 16, 2008 10:52 am Getting tossed thru a plate glass window at the front of a bowling alley in St. Paul springs to mind...
What stupid things have you done while drunk?
Posted on Apr 16, 2008 10:49 am
JDOD
Brother Number One
Member Since: Jan 22, 2008
You must have done some idiotic things. I know I have. Anyone got any funny ones? Any good drinking injuries.
Just a stupid one that immediately springs to mind is when I was 16 we were fitting out a rehersal room and I had this idea that we could cover the walls in carpet.
I woke up one morning with my mum poking me with a broom, and I was laying on the patio out the back of the house on top of a couple of layers of carpet with another carpet over me. God knows where I got them from I must have picked them up on the way home from somewhere, no idea how I carried them though, they were wet and weighed a ton!
I must have seen them in a skip or something and thought they'd be useful!
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Apr 16, 2008 10:52 am Getting tossed thru a plate glass window at the front of a bowling alley in St. Paul springs to mind...
Apr 16, 2008 11:04 am Was is an intentional attempt at human bowling or an accident?
I decided to take a "short cut" home from the pub when I was at uni which involved me creeping across the roofs of a few garages. I feel off the roof of one into someone back garden and broke my ankle, that hurt. I woke up in the garden a couple of hours later and limped home on it. I couldn't even stand when I tried to put weight on it the next day.
I fact, thinking about it now, my weekends are pretty much a constant stream of cock-ups. All good fun though.
Apr 16, 2008 11:25 am My senior year in college I had an off-campus apartment with 2 other guys. We all 3 developed a strange habit of bringing odd things home with us on the walk back from the bar with no memory of it the next morning. Amongst the more entertaining things:
- a spare tire
- a traffic cone
- a "no parking" sign, wooden 4x4 post and all
One night my roommates and I bought a jug of Capt. Morgan. We each had a drink or two and crashed out. One roommate stayed up and drank the rest of the jug (!!!). The next morning he was gone, along with our cordless phone and his Bronco. He showed up mid-afternoon caked in mud. Apparently he went for a cross-eyed off-roading expedition and got stuck. 12 hours later somebody happened by on a 4-wheeler and pulled him out. We never did find that phone.
This is the same roommate who got drunk at the bar, drove home, high-centered his Bronco on the concrete slab that formed our parking lot. In his attempt to jack the front end of his truck up, it fell off the jack and he caught his finger between the truck and the concrete slab. He yanked his finger out, tearing his fingernail almost entirely off in the process. He climbed back into the driver's seat, where he was approached by a friend. He ripped the nail the rest of the way off his finger, threw it at his friend and passed out on the steering wheel.
This is also the roommate who, in a drunken rage, went to go "talk" to his ex-girlfriend in her dorm room after hours. The doors lock at 10:00 or 11:00 and this was well past that time of night. So he did what anybody would have done: broke through the front window of the dorm, reached around to open the door from the inside, proceeded to her room and knocked her door off its hinges when she refused to answer. Then he sat there patiently on her couch while the police were summoned.
I have a few stories of my own, but his are way better :)
Apr 16, 2008 11:47 am Drinking and driving is really bad! Having know memory of it probably even worse. I still couldn't help laughing at that though!
Apr 16, 2008 12:12 pm What stupid things have I done? The stupidest one I can't even remember her name. Ooooohhhhh!!!!
Apr 16, 2008 12:14 pm She was the stupidest thing you've done. How stupid was she? did she even know her own name?
Apr 16, 2008 04:28 pm GOt kicked outta the bar my friend works at monday, and possibly got him fired...
Apr 16, 2008 04:46 pm one time a coffeeshop a friend and i frequented had a 'lock in' night. this meant that at closing time, the business would basically turn into some guy's private house, and it'd be a night of movie-watching, hanging out, drinking, and who knew what else. this place was in a strip mall and was lame inside.
i worked there at the time, sort of. it was maybe one or two nights a week, and it was restaurant-type wages + tips. except no one tipped. so i basically did nothing and made nothing. working was basically the same thing as being there as a customer but getting slightly paid for it. anyway, so i knew the boss/owner, who was only 28, and felt like the place was mine to some degree.
so i was upset when he vanished into the locked office with about four people, many of them girls, and locked the door. knocking didn't get me in. whatever was going on in there, i wanted to know or be involved, or something. i went into the kitchen (on the other side of the store) and climbed up onto the fridge. there was a bed/nest up there. the full-time cook was a drifter who lived up on the fridge, so there was a sleeping bag and a book and a small tape player, etc. i pocketed the sonic youth tape i found (experimental jet set: great album!) and removed a ceiling tile. they were cork.
i made my way inside the ceiling, intending to cross the hallway and then remove a tile and descend into the locked office. i don't remember how this worked exactly, but it was a short jaunt. i probably hung onto objects above my head and placed my feet carefully and lightly on something or other. anyway, of course my leg nearly instantly went through the cork. people in the main store--drunk and on mushrooms--suddenly saw my skinny leg burst through the roof above them, and there i was stuck. i then just decided to go down. broke through into the hallway.
the door opened. they were watching some lame animated movie, stoned. so i got my answer and that was that.
Apr 16, 2008 04:50 pm An old friend and I went on a drunky expedition around canton (detroit area) and surrounding areas. I remember getting kicked out of a driving range, i think we drove the truck up onto the driving area.
I vaguely remember hitting someone's (actually a few someone's) cars, trying to drive through some company's parking lot. I think we crunked 2 or 3 cars.
Later we were driving somewhere and he all of a sudden punches the windshield. Puts a big spider in it. As we went along, we kept punching the windshield, till it was mostly cracks, and no clear glass left.
Destroying our own stuff doesn't bother me much, but I feel pretty crappy about smacking into some un-suspecting person's car. That bums me out still.
Another time, in my youth, a group of us were drinking at the local bridge on a sunday afternoon, watching the tourist's head back downstate. Well, I got too tipsy, and decided to drive my XT500 dirt bike down the side of the road, in the ditch. No big problem, until I decided to get big air over the driveways that intersect my trial.
Needless to say, I ended up way to much over, and face-planted, wearing only shorts and tennis shoes. Left a big road rash scrape down my shin. I then proceeded to do it again, for some dumb reason. =/.
I've climbed water towers drunk, also buildings / houses as well.
Woke up doing 60 a few times, that's what got me started on being a 'non-drinker'. Glad i stopped before some innocent got hurt.
I've been kicked out a few places, usually because of the company I kept. I usually was more subdued, but some of my friends got pretty unruly =/.
Apr 16, 2008 05:35 pm I was 14. Got kinda lonely after drinking a little of the 'rents liquor.
Decided I wanted to go see my g/f in about 3 towns over. (45min) Of course, this was tooo far to walk. So, I took moms keys to the family van and drove off.
I wasn't drunk by any means. But, I'd also never been to her house. So, I kept driving for well over an hour and decided I needed to turn around. In doing so in this gravel road had ditches on both sides, I did a 2.5 point turn when the back wheels of the van fell in the ditches. I was stuck for it was 2 wheel drive.
I ran to the nearest farm house at 3 a.m. He answered with a gun. Took me into town and just dropped me off at the police station.
Apr 16, 2008 05:40 pm I plead the 5th. Wasn't me. Really.
Apr 16, 2008 05:46 pm heh, my brother and cousin went to town, and got tanked up on vodka. My cousin wasn't too bad, so he drove them both home (15 miles, in the country).
He sends my brother on his way, about 1.5 miles to our house.
Instead, my brother heads back to town, and drives around for around 3 hours, who knows where, and burns over 1/2 tank of gas.
Finally, he 'wakes' up, as he runs through a red light. A cop pulls him over, and sends him home, as my brother looks tired.
Driving around now, my brother realizes "hey, didn't I have my cousin with me?" so he starts looking around town for my cousin, who is sleeping soundly at home.
Finally, my brother calls my cousin's house, saying he can't find him. The father calls upstairs, "are you up there son?" to which my cousin replies "yes".
Telling the father the story, they got a huge kick out of this. My brother still has no idea where he went, or what he did. We assume he just drove around for a few hours, but the town is rather small, so he must have made like 500 trips though town =).
Apr 16, 2008 09:17 pm I was a bad wittle boy til about 27. i got up to all sorts. cant think of the stupidist thing now im reflecting, anything stupid i did was as stupid as the previous...stupid.
for some reason i pulled my head in about 5 years ago.
i think i always had very high testosterone. thats my excuse and im stickin to it.
Apr 16, 2008 09:42 pm Woke up in the middle of a drunk night and peed in the closet...all over my roommate's laundry basket.
Did it again years later...this time all over my wife's needlework bag.
Apr 16, 2008 10:07 pm I recall an encounter with large bottle of tequila and a 30 y/o malaysian woman when I was 16... She was pretty fit though. Continued to party after, blacked out and party people drew penis's on my face with a permanant marker.
Found out she was married in the morning (only for a visa apparently), had a flight to catch, tried to scrub the penis's of my face to no avail, so ended up at the airport with them still all over my face hahaha.
Many a good time on the bottle!
Apr 16, 2008 11:21 pm Left a beach party one night, or probably early morning with a friend on the back of my bike during a summer in high school. Remember clearing the park. Woke up in a strange cabin full of strange dudes playing cards. No friend to be found. They gave me coffee, that was cool. Got on the bike and there was no second gear. I guess that qualifies as stupid or drunk... or is there a difference?
Apr 18, 2008 05:32 pm i got one, i got one:
www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,351723,00.html
Russian Man Falls Asleep With Knife Stuck in His Back After Heavy Drinking
What a pain in the neck.
A Russian man woke up after a night of heavy drinking to find a knife wedged into his skin between his shoulder blades, the Telegraph reported on Friday.
Yuri Lyalin, 53, said he could not remember details of the night after being woken by his wife, who noticed the knife protruding out of his back.
The electrician reportedly had an argument with his drinking buddy, passed out and was stabbed at the factory where he works in Vologda, Russia.
Lyalin woke up, rode the bus home, ate breakfast and fell into a deep sleep without realizing there was a 6-inch blade penetrating his skin, the story reported.
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