Sink in the ocean of a kiss (For Boys Mum)

> > > Sink in the ocean of a kiss (For Boys Mum)

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Hello!
Member Since: Jan 12, 2004

Hey BM

Here is my music added to your lyrics for the song you wanted looking at. Ive just realised I got the song title wrong in the thread title (DOH!!!)...still, its right in the actual song!!

The lyrics are great by the way (I didnt touch them other than drop a word or two so I could sing it).

This is quite rough. I jammed out the tune (I had this tune in my head for a while) - it just needed some lyrics. So, this is a kinda one take.

Vocals are not perfect but are there as a guide so you would know how it sounds in my head. Obviously, its your lyrics so you can change what you'd like - I am but a humble songster!!

So, here is what I ended up (just me and ma acoustic):

www.badmartini.co.uk/oceanofyourkiss.mp3

You can let me know your thoughts..if you like - cool. If not, I have some other ideas (tho this seemed to fit good). I had thought of extending the main riff throughout the verses...you'll see what I mean when you listen.

Cheers...

Coco.

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Czar of Midi
Administrator
Since: Apr 04, 2002

Oct 24, 2004 09:52 pm

coco, I fixed the title. And you did sing my kiss several times as well.

Now I must go wipe the tears from my eyes before I type any more. I had to listen a few times to catch most of the lyrics, but that was very good indeed. Lotsa feelings in there.

There is some great emotion expressed there BM. I wish I could write like that, but mine usually ends up with the instruments conveying the emotion.

coco, I may try and mess about with some padding for that later after the xmass tune. But I kinda like it as the acuostic version.

Member
Since: Apr 22, 2004

Oct 24, 2004 10:50 pm

Coco I know I asked you...but...I can't believe you've done this...its got to rate as one of the most generous things...

And this is before I can listen to it...I'm waiting for my son so I can use his computer...

Cheers...and if I could do backing vocals for you...if you ever needed female vox...

BM :-)




Member
Since: Apr 22, 2004

Oct 24, 2004 11:01 pm

Thanks for that Noize...I felt a bit embarrassed after I'd sent the lyrics...because I wasn't sure whether they would make Coco laugh or not...and if they did make him laugh, then he would have to like pretend he liked them...or then again he might not have pretended...

Actually there is a little story there...my son said to me, "You write some lyrics and I'll do the music..."

Then he told me my lyrics stank...hehehe...he said they might be...TOO awesome!

Cheers Noize...

BM


Czar of Midi
Administrator
Since: Apr 04, 2002

Oct 24, 2004 11:57 pm

No need to be embaressed at all. Some people write what they feel, and can convey it well. Others arent able to do it as well as you see to have there.

Besides, I like a good kinda mushy tune now and again. the ones that make ya feel all squishy and what not.

Noize

Member
Since: Jul 02, 2003

Oct 25, 2004 02:20 am

Yep great job coco & BM. I think you did a great job putting some music and vocal to the lyrics coco.

Lyric's aren't easy and are one of my weak points, most of my songs, I listen to now and think what the heck was I trying to say. LOL

Dan

Hello!
Member
Since: Jan 12, 2004

Oct 25, 2004 02:45 am

Cheers guys...I appreciate the comments tho I would say the lyrics kinda made the music pretty easy to write.

BM, no - I NEVER laugh at anyone's lyrics. I liked these lyrics - the song is a kinda ballad. Theres nothig wrong with that, every singer and band (well most) have done ballads from the 50's crooners thru to GNR and Metallica. I LIKE these lyrics, so - no need to feel embarassed or anything like that. My song "Apart From You" was along the same lines and you dug that song, I had the same reservations but I just said "what the hell" and went for it.

For the record, I am happy for you to sing this one outright if you want - its your lyrics. I just sang the song roughly so you'd know how I seen the words fit. But, I can pass ya the guitar parts if ya want and you can do it. Alternatively, I'll make some time this week and knock together a far better set of vocals for it. Then pass it to ya for your own adding of what ya want...no problem. As I Say, I dont wanna take over this song cause I'd like to hear your vocal on it to hear how you'd do it - be kinda fun...I'll leave that up to you.

Thanks for the collab - it was refreshing to have some well written lyrics that didnt take me years to find a tune...mark of good words I guess!

Noize and OldDog - thanks for listening and the words...always much appreciated. Its good to know folks like yourself support folks like BM who may be a little aprehensive with their work - so..BM - NEVER FEAR - we're all the same here at HRC...music lovers.

Cheers...

Coco.

Member
Since: Apr 22, 2004

Oct 25, 2004 03:35 am

Coco, I've lost count of the number of times I've listened to the song...

I knew that it would be so...

My voice is quite different to yours, although for backing vocals, I can generally match my voice to the lead.

But because I know what the poem is about I have a different perspective on the song...I knew you would lift it out of that.

I prefer you singing this song Coco. That is so amazing that you made time for this...even though you are so busy...

And for the first take on it, the intro sets the mood...gets my skin tingling...

What else I like?
'your eyes are black pools of lies' - I like the way you lighten that line in the way you soften 'lies'

The chorus - I like the way you build at the end of the verse to introduce and lift the chorus. Its subtle.

'unrestrained magnetic attraction' - the way you sing 'ne' in the middle of magnetic, I don't know how to explain it yet.

'sinks in the ocean of a kiss' - the way you've put accent on the 'o' in ocean.

'rising warmth and simmering conduction' - the way you sing the 'sim' in simmering

'the finish line is on the moon' - the way you build from 'on' to 'moon'

'like fishnets hooked too easily' - the way you sing 'easily'

Coco, I don't see you as taking over...I can feel what you're trying to achieve and I'm good for that.

Cheers Coco,

BM

PS Wow! I have a song!





Hello!
Member
Since: Jan 12, 2004

Oct 25, 2004 07:18 am

Good stuff BM - I am glad you liked it. The tune is something I've had turing round in my head for ages now and it just needed some good lyrics to set it free!!

Anyways, good lyrics they are and some good images conjured to my ears - never doubt your ability to write lyrics - these are good.

I will get a "proper" version laid down as soon as I gets a chance...I'll basically duplicate what I done here, only tidy it up a little and avoid any flat notes :-) !! Perfection is the aim of my game...!

As for you having a song - you do indeed, which, if I am honest, the tune pretty much wrote itself for the lyrics. So, good job and good lyrics.

Cheers...

Coco.


Czar of Cheese
Member
Since: Jun 09, 2004

Oct 25, 2004 08:21 am

Wow!

BM: Great set of lyrics! Very poetic...great imagery.

Coco: Great tune! It fits the lyrics perfectly. I love the guitar introduction...that riff will be famous someday.

I can't wait to hear a more polished, fully orchestrated version. Great potential.

Jim

Member
Since: Apr 22, 2004

Oct 25, 2004 09:05 am

Lol Old Dog...I've listened to 'Sink in the Ocean of a Kiss' mibbe 50 times now and I had to return to the poem a couple of times to remember what it was all about...hehehe :-)

Thanks for the good words Noize...although the song is actually about great pain :-(...Coco's treatment has softened it :-)

And thanks Jim...I'm a fan of Shakespeares sonnets and haiku.

But I'm going to leave it all to Coco now...if you don't mind Coco...its like you just know...

Cheers...

BM

Member
Since: Apr 22, 2004

Oct 25, 2004 09:56 am

Oh Coco...just one thing...I was wondering about 'Sink in the Ocean of a Kiss' the original title as opposed to 'Ocean of Your Kiss'.

What are your thoughts?

Cheers...

BM :-)

Hello!
Member
Since: Jan 12, 2004

Oct 25, 2004 01:42 pm

Ah, now that was a typo by me - it was 1am hence the recording being a bit rough and the typo :-)!!

I Think the title was just fine with what you had :-) !!

So, 'Sink in the Ocean of a Kiss' is fine with me - perfect.

As I Say, thanks for the kind words, I'll put this together with a better take and you can whack on some backing vox if you like?? If not, it'll remain as is for you to do as you please with.

Again, cheers for the collab...

Coco.

Frisco's Most Underrated
Member
Since: Jan 28, 2003

Oct 25, 2004 02:58 pm

Holy crap. This is an awesome song, lyrics and arrangement. I honestly think this song has top 40 hit potential. I love the version you have up right now coco. You said you just jammed it out, and though the performance doesn't sound perfect, it sounds REAL, as if you are performing for a listener who is right there in the room with you, not just recording. I've had this on repeat for about 15 minutes so far.

With that being said, I'd love to hear this track recorded "perfectly" with some other instruments thrown in the mix. I think it would blow people away. Awesome job guys.

Hello!
Member
Since: Jan 12, 2004

Oct 25, 2004 04:18 pm

Hey Coolo - thanks for the good mang and comments here buddy - glad ya liked it. I am astounded by how quickly I managed to get this tune - tho I must say, it was helped MASSIVELY by the top lyrics here to ma ears.

It usually takes me a few weeks to do anything that sounds half decent, so thanks for the comments. I guess sometimes its good to follow the instincts, nae messin and just get it down on a track.

I am now thinking I'll get back up that studio whilst its still fresh, put together a better version like this and also expirement with a full arrangement. I'd also like to hear BM's backing vocals cause that would be simply awesome. I've NEVER sung any songs with female backing yet I reckon it would really come across well for this song in particular...

Again Coolo, again thanks for the comments. Mucho appreciated.

Coco.

Czar of Midi
Administrator
Since: Apr 04, 2002

Oct 25, 2004 11:40 pm

coco, I puttered with a couple of pads for underneath it last night. Found a couple that might do. When I get a few moments piece here, maybe tommorrow night I will lay em over your first mix and pop em up.

Pinnipedal Czar (: 3=
Member
Since: Apr 11, 2004

Oct 26, 2004 12:37 am

Wow ! How incredibly well-rounded !... Great lyrics !!! (Can't wait to hear the 'tops' version !) Great work guys ! Man, I heard all sorts of stuff in there ! With an arangement like that, the possabilities are pretty vast . Good luck with this one, guys... it is a treasure for sure !

Hello!
Member
Since: Jan 12, 2004

Oct 26, 2004 07:19 am

Thanks for the listen Hue - much appreciated and thanks for the kind words...

Hey Noize, thats cool - I cant wait to hear what you do with this. I am thinkin some piano would be cool for a fuller arrangement.

I think I'll have 2 arrangements for this one - an acoustic/vocal version (tidied up from this one) and perhaps a full arrangement (still based round the acoustic/vocals) with some piano/drums/bass and if you can throw something else in there too, that would be super cool!

Dunno...these is all just ideas - I would like to hear what ya do tho Noize...bring it on buddy.

Coco.

Member
Since: Apr 22, 2004

Oct 26, 2004 07:56 am

Hey Coco...I've done some backing vocals...see what you think. I'll email them later today/tonight...

Cheers...

BM

Hello!
Member
Since: Jan 12, 2004

Oct 26, 2004 08:59 am

Great...send them over and I'll see if I can mix em into the track I have for now.

I've started a new version too which is a tad higher but it sounds sooo much better to my ears. However, I'll see what I can do with this mix and if it works, I'll get ya to record em again in the new key to the new version (tho when the new version is done I wont change it again) and we can see about hammerin the acoustic version at least.

Full version will take a bit longer!! Maybe the acoustic version will be enough ... we'll see.

Anyways...send those parts right on over..canny wait to hear em.

Cheers

Coco.

Member
Since: Apr 22, 2004

Oct 27, 2004 08:00 am

OK...the backing vocals are good to go but I see my son has forgotten to send them (I've not learnt all that jazz yet...)

So the chorus is sung 3x and I've put two lines of harmony in the first one to see what you think...I know you'll sort it Coco.

If it doesn't sound like what you were thinking, no worries...it was fun just doing this take...anyways I can keep this version for posterity.

The vocals are just me without anything done to them...but when you listen you'll get the picture as to whether they're suitable ideas or not.

Cheers...and thanks again Coco,

BM

Member
Since: Apr 22, 2004

Oct 27, 2004 08:31 am

Hey Noize if you're back at this thread again...

Well every time I see the title of this thread I think OK, but now I'm thinking I wish it could be the actual title...does that sound very silly?

Its just that, 'Sink in the ocean of a kiss' is actually a metaphor...I feel a bit foolish asking but...would you mind changing the title of the thread for me?...I mean thats if its not too big a deal?

Cheers,

BM :-)

Administrator
Since: Apr 03, 2002

Oct 27, 2004 08:32 am

how's that?

Member
Since: Apr 22, 2004

Oct 27, 2004 08:35 am

Thank you very much dB :-)

Cheers,

BM

Member
Since: Apr 22, 2004

Oct 27, 2004 05:20 pm

Hey Coco!

This is probably gonna sound like a pretty basic question...but where do I send the audio files so they get to ya?

And also...I'm not entirely happy with my tracks but it's more to give you a feel for it...hope thats ok (quality-wise).

Cheers...

BM

Hello!
Member
Since: Jan 12, 2004

Oct 27, 2004 06:41 pm

Nae probs BM...just send them to my Martini address as usual or, send me a link if you have them uploaded anywhere...its just as easy for me either way.

The email may be easier for ya in which case, attach them to an email and send em. If they're MP3's it would be easier but its fine if they're WAV...send away!

Coco.

Member
Since: Apr 22, 2004

Oct 28, 2004 02:48 am

Hey Coco...I've lost the email address... probably when I deleted stuff...I wouldn't call this computer game, an area of strength for me.

But my son has contacted you via badmartini for the email address...he's going to send the mp3's.

You've got a bit of a fan there re recording.

Cheers,

BM


Member
Since: Apr 22, 2004

Oct 28, 2004 02:51 am

PS

Its not an easy task to impress a teenager.

Cheers again...

BM

Hello!
Member
Since: Jan 12, 2004

Oct 28, 2004 07:12 am

Hey BM

Thats fine...I'll check that addy when Im back from work. Nice one. Probs wont be til next week til I have a chance to mix it all up but I will do it, and when its done, I'll post the link up here on HRC.

A fan eh! I thought the biggest fan I had was the revolving one 2 feet above my head :-) ! Seriously, thats cool. I like it when others dig the music..thats why I do it. So, good to know someone is liking it out there other than me!! hehe.

Cheers again.

Coco.

Member
Since: Apr 22, 2004

Oct 29, 2004 05:02 am

Hey Coco,

Thanks...the mp3's have been sent to you just this moment...

Can you just keep in mind that I'm not entirely happy with the harmonies?...but if you can use them - all well and good...if not...no worries.

I'm good with whatever you decide...

Cheers Coco...

BM

Member
Since: Apr 22, 2004

Oct 29, 2004 06:22 am

PS...

The harmonies have a nice ring to them through my cans...but through the monitors they sound further apart.

The vox are raw with nothing done to them.

Cheers Coco...

BM

Hello!
Member
Since: Jan 12, 2004

Oct 29, 2004 06:52 am

No problem...I'll just use this as the test mix cause I am less than happy with my own vocals and geetar on this track (tho, it was a scratch track kinda test the water version).

Ive started another version which is the same arrangement, only a couple of keys higher and it sounds so much better.

When I get this one nailed, I'll pass ya the copy and you can take as long as you need to pop the vocals on if you like. Then, we can alter the arrangement as needed i.e. add more instruments etc...whatever.

I'll not judge you down..never fear. OK, I'll see if I can squeeze a little time this weekend to do something with these vocals. Then, when I get this laid out, it'll be a kinda "test" for the version I am nailing just now which will be a hundred times better.

Cheers...

Coco.

Member
Since: Apr 22, 2004

Oct 29, 2004 03:15 pm

How does one person get to be so great? Good on ya Coco!

Cheers...

BM

Hello!
Member
Since: Jan 12, 2004

Oct 29, 2004 05:18 pm

OK BM...still not received the MP3's. I'll email ya and you can just reply to my email then we'll be using the correct addy.

Dunno why it didnt work but I'll go do it now.

No problemo...collabs are good.

Cheers...

Coco.

Member
Since: Apr 22, 2004

Oct 29, 2004 06:14 pm

Sorry 'bout messin' you around Coco...damn...

I'll check it out now.

Cheers...

BM

Hello!
Member
Since: Jan 12, 2004

Oct 29, 2004 07:53 pm

Never worry...its all cool.

I got your email...problem will be solved shortly!

Cheers

Coco.

Member
Since: Apr 22, 2004

Oct 29, 2004 09:23 pm

Cool...just sorry that the collab is putting extra on you.

Cheers...

BM

Hello!
Member
Since: Jan 12, 2004

Oct 30, 2004 04:24 am

Never fear...email now received. Now were good to go!

Cheers...

Coco.

Member
Since: Apr 22, 2004

Oct 30, 2004 05:56 am

Sweeet as (kiwi saying)!

Cheers,

BM

Hello!
Member
Since: Jan 12, 2004

Nov 08, 2004 07:44 pm

OK!! Bad news BM...whilst I did in the end get that vocal take you done - I went to remix with my version tonight and fogot, I deleted my old verison (now 2 keys lower than the latest) meaning I couldnt use! Grrrr....DOH!!

Good news, here is a better version than I originally done.

www.badmartini.co.uk/oceanofakiss.mp3

Thoughts, feedback etc - as ever, welcome.

I am still toying with brinigin in "something" - Noize said he had something to bring, I think I could with this to flesh a new version out a bit.

Coco.

Hello!
Member
Since: Jan 12, 2004

Nov 08, 2004 07:46 pm

Meant to say, distinct improvement in this version - I sing the right words :-) !!

hehe

Coco.

Member
Since: Jul 02, 2003

Nov 09, 2004 02:56 am

Coming along nicely coco. Can't wait to hear it with BM's harmonies and if Noize gets ya "something" to go along with it. :)

Dan

Member
Since: Apr 22, 2004

Nov 09, 2004 05:05 am

Hey Coco...no worries :-)

I'm just still grappling with your generosity... :-)

I have to listen on my sons computer...bcos mine is useless for mp3s...damn!...can't wait to hear it though!

Also its that time of the year for us...at the end of next week we leave the city for the country...no flash computer there...no, no, nope.

The studio will be closed until next year when we return...unfortunately, my son has run out of time...currently he is sitting exams...but he should be keen as mustard next year!

Cheers always Coco...

BM

Hello!
Member
Since: Jan 12, 2004

Nov 09, 2004 06:54 am

Hey Olddog

Thanks for the mang...always appreciated and respected.

BM - no worries. Away from the studio - I couldnae live with that maself!! Would be a nightmare for me...still, keen he will be as yi say.

Cheers.

Coco.

Member
Since: Apr 22, 2004

Nov 09, 2004 05:13 pm

Nah...he's none too happy with leaving his studio...still, he'll have plenty of time for writing and composing riffs and recording the basic ideas...which should be good.

I like the new version too...hell...I like everything you do!

In the original key and version, the harmonies sang out to me.

The new version has slightly changed the feel of the song - there's plenty going on with the eqing and reverb - the melody sounds more full...less spaces to fill with harmonies...

Would you want back up vox for this version...which I'm happy to provide if you think they'll add rather than detract?

I'm still a learner...what are your thoughts Coco?


Cheers,

BM :-)

Hello!
Member
Since: Jan 12, 2004

Nov 09, 2004 06:20 pm

Aye, the reverb may be a little too full I think BM - checked the mix in the car today - seems a bit full which is fillin up the mix.

By all means take the backing vox and give em yer best. I thinks, I'll tinker with this a little longer anyway til I get it right.

The feel is a little different now due to the key change, the correct words :-) and the way I sung it i.e. I tried to sing it rather than just spit the words out. So, its more melodic than the original which is a little bit of a pain as I hit a few good notes the first time but thats the luck of the draw sometimes - I aint no singer!!! That is my biggest and most annoying musical fault - unable to replicate a good vocal take sometimes.

Still, it's gettin better - at least I am now producing a new take in key (mainly :-). I used to not only be unable to replicate a track but the 2nd, 3rd and xyz take would also be WORSE!!

Anyways...I'll plug on here and there and when Im done, I'll pass ya the file for u to expirement with backings. YOu can fire these to me to if you want, but you can also have a shot at mixing and this is a good wee chance to try your mixing skills. Also, you have the advantage of mixing in yerself...maybe a good starting point.

All the best...

Coco.

Member
Since: Apr 22, 2004

Nov 09, 2004 09:28 pm

QUOTE:
"I aint no singer"

I'm afraid you're wrong there Coco...yeah, yeah...I know...you're a guitarist an' all...:-)

Now...I can sing...live I sound alright...but recording makes me sound drunk...hehe...its even worse if the words make me cry!

You have an expresssiveness...that is like a picture...just one note and the word says it all...

To my ear...its right throughout your music...

It's at least one of the reasons...that I know of so far...that I like your work.

I think Noize thinks along similar lines...

So...OK...I'll wait for you to finish up and then I'll have a go...that'll be fun Coco!

Cheers...

BM

Hello!
Member
Since: Jan 12, 2004

Nov 10, 2004 07:15 am

Ah, thanks again BM - yer always good to hear!

I'll be doing ya a new mix with the same lines/instruments - am gonny try and clean the mix a little to make some space for more "stuff".

As yet, dunno what that stuff will be. When its done, I'll sure as hell let ya hear it tho...and, I am hoping it will be far better. I really like this little song now actually, its very nice lyrically so it makes it easy to work with...cool.

Cheers...

Member
Since: Apr 22, 2004

Nov 10, 2004 04:06 pm

No worries Coco...I'm a pretty honest person...now THAT'S an annoying fault...

Cheers Coco...

BM

Czar of Midi
Administrator
Since: Apr 04, 2002

Nov 22, 2004 10:39 pm

Yep, its me late as ever. I will redo what I had to fit the new vocal key coco. And BM, I hope going to the country doesnt mean you wont be stopping into the forum as I for one will miss yer witty way. I cant wait to here it with your backing vox BM, that would be the first girl voice we've had take part on a colab around here.

And ya coco, I agree with the verb being a bit rich. IT is however a good sounding reverb though so I would think just just a tad less wet on the verb and it should all be good.

Member
Since: Apr 22, 2004

Nov 23, 2004 12:22 am

Ah no worries Noize...we just appreciate you're making some time in your schedule...thats very generous...so thanks for that.

Usually, we are away to the country when my son finishes school...but now he's off to look at these audio engineering schools...to make a choice for next year and more teenage bands are turning up for recording.

Also I believe in what dB and Flame are doing, so I'm wanting to try and support those ideas. Just wont be any flash recording gear in the country...thats all...just my dumb and slovenly computer!

Well, and now there is the blues ditty and also 'Sink in the Ocean of a Kiss.'

Cheers Noize,

BM :-)

sloppy dice, drinks twice
Member
Since: Aug 05, 2003

Nov 27, 2004 09:31 am

I was unable to open the file... got a server error

Hello!
Member
Since: Jan 12, 2004

Nov 27, 2004 10:14 am

Hey Tincan

Give this a go:

www.badmartini.co.uk/oceanofakiss.mp3

Just worked a moment ago...if nae luck again - lemme know and thanks for giving it a go!

Cheers bud

Coco

> > > Sink in the ocean of a kiss (For Boys Mum)

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