Songs Written to an Existing Title po...

Back when I participated in a usenet forum, we used to have a writing challenge. We would vote on titles, the one with highest vote would win. Then we'd all write songs (or just lyrics) using that one title and compare. That's what's going on with the "Same Song Madness" at guitaristworks.com...

So here I have written 4 songs (err... lyrics), all using the same title, each having it's own unique perspective and interpretation of the hook. I decided to have a little fun with it. Emphasis on FUN.... the title they chose was, "Six Feet and a Stone".

======================================
Version 1
======================================
Six Feet and a Stone
Copyright (c) DungBeatle

Verse 1:
I had a nasty cramping in my butt,
And it made it so I couldn't straighten up.
So I found a good masseuse,
Who took a look at my caboose,
And she promised me that I would soon be well.

So I dropped my pants and undies to the floor,
Then she tried to find a way to my back door.
But my body was in curls,
So she called in two more girls,
And they dragged into the room the rock from hell...

Chorus:
Six feet and a stone
Rolled around my sore tailbone
Little feet massaged my rump, it was severe!
While I layed there, total prone,
There were six feet and a stone,
Yes, six feet and a stone upon my rear!

Verse 2:
Now it's not my place to argue with the pros,
But my butt is not the place for thirty toes.
With my derrière in heat,
And the flip-side in retreat,
It was all that I could do to merely pray.

She smiled and said, "We've only just begun."
I could swear my butt was headed for the sun!
As the flames were rollin' off,
She said, "Turn your head and cough."
In an instant my cajones were soufflé...

[To Chorus]

======================================
Version 2
======================================
Six Feet and a Stone
Copyright (c) DungBeatle

Verse 1:
I was born with my two brothers,
Mother nature was unkind.
We're attached to one another
Their four legs up my behind.

Now I know it looks quite funny
As they dangle and they flop,
But there's a diamond for a honey
Who would tie the triple knot...

Chorus:
Six feet and a stone
By that offer I am known
Every woman wants a boulder
I just get their icy shoulder
In the eye of the beholder
I'm just six feet and a stone
Yes, six feet and a stone...

Verse 2:
I have asked a thousand girlies
To become my loving wife.
Some replies have been quite surly
And some others quote a price.

But no loving affirmation
Ever comes from women's lips.
Perhaps if our connection
Started at my brothers' hips.

[To Chorus]

======================================
Version 3
======================================
Six Feet and a Stone
Copyright (c) DungBeatle

Verse 1:
I had a urinary puzzle,
There was very little doubt.
Something stuck insize my "muzzle"
And it needed to come out.

It was building up some pressure,
When my "gun" began to shake,
Then my horrified "compressor"
Just exploded with a quake!

Chorus:
My kidney stone,
My! How it's grown.
When my body passed it
And it flew across my home,
From the center of the blast,
It was six feet and a stone.
Yes, six feet and a stone!

Verse 2:
Now that I am peeing,
I'm as happy as a clam,
'Cause the stream that I am seeing
Means there is no little dam.

If you miss the way it dazzles,
And the crowds all want to watch,
Take a slingshot and a pebble,
And go stick it in your crotch!

[To Chorus]

======================================
Version 4
======================================
Six Feet and a Stone
Copyright (c) DungBeatle

Packin' a pair o' sixes, 40 notches on the side,
Stood the fastest gun in Texas, then he took another stride.
In the streets of old Laredo he was gunnin' 41,
When he reached for them two pistols, he drew air and pointed none.

He had left them in the cat house, he removed them for the night,
'Cause the woman he was lovin' wouldn't love with guns in sight.
With his 6 foot frame a shakin', he bent down to pluck a rock,
Then he threw it at his rival, but his rival made the shot.

So they buried him next mornin', 'cause they didn't have no ice,
And they made a little marker to report the fool's demise:
With his weapon in his holster, buried here and lying prone
Is the dumbest gun in Texas, "Six Feet and a Stone"
Yes, "Six Feet and a Stone"