Jun 30, 2003 07:08 am There were two muffins sitting in the oven, one muffin said "Wow, it's hot in here". The other muffin said "WHOA! a talking muffin!"
anyone know a good joke?
Posted on Jun 30, 2003 07:07 am
flame
...bringing sexy back
Member Since: Jul 01, 2002
cos its been quite slow here the last couple of days...
come on peeps, make me laugh!
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Jun 30, 2003 07:08 am There were two muffins sitting in the oven, one muffin said "Wow, it's hot in here". The other muffin said "WHOA! a talking muffin!"
Jun 30, 2003 07:29 am lol, i made myself laugh with that reply!
Jun 30, 2003 08:03 am two blondes walk into a bar....
you'd have thought one of them would've seen it.
Jun 30, 2003 08:42 am a dyslexic guy walks into bra...
Jun 30, 2003 01:43 pm A man goes out fishing with his buddies and doesn't tell his wife. He's gone for three days. When he does get home, his wife is really chewin hi out. She suddenly stops and asks him, "How wouldyou like to not see me for a few days?" He replies, "That would be OK"
Monday goes by and he doesn't see her, Tuesday goes by and he doesn't see her, Wedsnesday comes around and as the swelling goes down he could see her a little bit out of the corner of his left eye.
Jun 30, 2003 02:58 pm While attending a marriage seminar on communication, David and his wife listened to the instructor declare,
"It is essential that husbands and wives know the things that are important to each other."
He addressed the man, "Can you describe your wife's favorite flower?"
David leaned over, touched his wife's arm gently and whispered, "It's Pillsbury All-Purpose, isn't it?"
Jun 30, 2003 03:00 pm OK, that was is getting passed on to my "guy list" in Outlook :-D
Jun 30, 2003 03:17 pm Well okay, add this one to your 'guy' list:
Q: Why are women and rocks alike?
A: You skip the flat ones.
Jun 30, 2003 03:18 pm I have a couple to add here, but, well, I try to keep a family friendly site so I relucantly digress...
Jun 30, 2003 05:18 pm Everynight a man goes to the pub and stays until closing. When he gets home his wife is angry and warns him "You keep staying out all night you'll soon be visited by the devil himself!"
So the next night she dressed up as the devil and hid behind his car. the pub closed and her husband comes staggering to his car while fumbling with the keys. as soon as he opens the door the wife jumps out from behind the car and screams "ROOAARR! I'M THE DEVIL!!" The man extended his hand and said "Nice to meet you. I'm the guy that married your sister."
Jul 01, 2003 02:29 am O.K this is not a dig, just a musician joke, more for the gigging muso really.
Whats the difference between a musician and a pension policy?
The pension policy will mature one day!
Vikki
Jul 04, 2003 10:25 am Q:Whats the difference between a blond and a mosquito?
A:The mosquito stops sucking when you slap it.
Jul 05, 2003 01:42 pm You know your music is bad when you turn noise reduction on and everything suddently goes silent!
Jul 07, 2003 07:53 am how many bassists does it take to change a lightbulb?
they don't change them. they take them out, boil them and put them back in again.
Jul 08, 2003 06:00 pm I was happy. My girlfriend and I were dating for over a year, and so we
> decided to get married. My parents helped us in every way, my friends
> encouraged me. And my girlfriend? She was a dream! There was only one
> thing bothering me, and that was my mother-in-law to be. She was a
> career woman, smart, but most of all beautiful and sexy, who sometimes
> flirted with me, which made me feel quite uncomfortable. One day
> mother-in-law called me and asked me to come over to check the wedding
> invitations. So I went. She was alone when I arrived. As we looked at
> the invitations, she rubbed her breasts into me so enticingly. I could
> not help but notice through her sheer blouse that she was wearing no
> bra. Her breasts were magnificent, to say the least. She whispered to
> me, that soon I was going to be married, and that she had feelings and
> desires for me that she couldn't overcome. She went on to indicate that
> before I got married and committed my life to her daughter, she wanted
> to make love to me just once. She pointed out that no one would be home
> for at least three hours. What could I say? I was in total shock, and
> couldn't say a word. So, she said, "I'll go upstairs to the bedroom,
> and if you are up for it, just come and get me." I stood there for a
> moment, watching her go up the stairs in her form-fitting miniskirt. I
> then turned around and went to the front door... I opened it, and
> stepped out of the house. Her husband was standing outside and, with
> tears in his eyes, he hugged me and said, "We are very happy and
> pleased, you have passed our little test. We couldn't have asked for a
> better man for our daughter. Welcome to the family."
>
> Moral of the story:
>
>
>
>
>
>
> Always keep your condoms in your car.
Jul 08, 2003 07:38 pm hehehehehehe, oh wow where did you get that? Penthouse forum?
Jul 08, 2003 08:28 pm I knew you guys would like that,just one i heard at work.....hmmmmm penthouse forum.............well ,gotta run!!!!!!
Jul 09, 2003 08:18 pm How many software technicians does it take to change a light bulb?
None, that's a hardware issue.
Jul 09, 2003 08:38 pm 2 leprechauns go to the vatican, they demand to see the pope. So after waiting on line they finally get in and ask the pope "are there any midget nuns in dublin?" the pope responds "no, there are not any midget nuns in dublin",
are there any midget nuns in all of ireland who could have visited dublin?"
"no"
"ARE THERE ANY MIDGET NUNS IN THE WHOLE WORLD?"
"no, im sorry, there are no midget nuns"
the other leprechaun says "see, i told you you banged a penguin!"
sorry i just had to throw that one in
Jul 09, 2003 08:41 pm What Happened when the pope went to mount Olive?
Popeye kicked his @$$!
Jul 11, 2003 10:09 am just got emailed this......
A farmer is sitting in the neighborhood bar slowly getting drunk. A man comes in and asks the farmer, “Hey,why are you sitting here on this beautiful day getting drunk?”
The farmer says, “Some things you just can’texplain.”
“So what happened that is so horrible?” the man asked.
The farmer then decides to try an answer, “Well if you must know, today I was sitting by my cow milking her. Just as I got the bucket about full, she took her left leg and kicked it over.”
“That’s not so bad,what’s the big deal?”
The farmer says, “Some things you just can’t explain.”
“So what happened?” the man asked again.
The farmer relenting, continued, “I took her left leg and tied it to the post on the left with some rope. Then I sat down and continued to milk her. Just as I got the bucket about full she took her right leg and kicked it over.”
“Again?”
The farmer says, “Some things you just can’t explain.”
“So, what did you do then?” the man asked, intrigued.
“I took her right leg and tied it to the post on the right. I sat back down and continued to milk her, and just as I got the bucket just about full, the stupid cow knocked over the bucket with her tail.”
“Wow, you must have been pretty upset!” but that’s no reason to just sit here getting all depressed.”
The farmer says, “Some things you just can’t explain.”
“So then what else did you do?” the man asked again. “
Well I didn’t have any more rope, so I took off my belt and tied her tail to the rafter. That’s when my pants fell down and my wife walked in…”
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