Suicide sucks...
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Posted on Nov 28, 2011 11:23 am
Hue
Pinnipedal Czar (: 3=
Member Since: Apr 11, 2004
An old friend, and the guy who gave me his touring-case for my LesPauls, had a fight with his wife, walked outside, put a gun to his head and pulled the trigger.
Now when I open that case, instead of thinking about the good friend I have, I now have to consider all the should'a/could'a/would'a-beens. Just terrible. Such a selfish act... if people only knew what dammage is done when they take these steps, I wonder if they would still do it? Such a permanent solution to lifes temporary problems. Left two teenage daughters to deal with this, too. I'm both sad, as well as piping-hot mad about this.
Two pals in less than a month... more blues than I care to deal with.
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Nov 28, 2011 11:28 am Oh, man, Hue, so sorry to read this, that sucks...
How are his wife and kids handling it thus far? I assume poorly as it's very recent. What drives people to such actions makes me assume that the pain they cause others really doesn't matter to them, as it likely so much pales in relation to the pain they themselves are feeling at the time. Makes me feel bad for them.
I was watching Titanic yesterday while sick on on the couch, with my 10 year old...the scene where the guy that was trying to organize the rescue rafts finally admitted to himself there was nothing he could do, so he pulled his gun, saluted his coworkers and shot himself...had I remembered that scene I would have turned the channel, but it did inspire a pretty deep conversation with a very young kid none the less. The pain and hopelessness had to be overwhelming, as it must have been for your friend.
Sorry to hear of your loss, and for the ladies that have to pick up the pieces.
HuePinnipedal Czar (: 3= Member
Since: Apr 11, 2004
Nov 28, 2011 11:38 am Right. I have to remind myself that suicide is a "natural solution, when ones pain outwieghs their means of dealing with it". Pffft... The thing is, is that life is inherently difficult for most people. I've been depressed, and had enough 'reasons' of my own... just doesn't seem like killing oneself would make anything 'better' for anyone. Let alone the guy in the ground.
It is a real mess for those he left within his imediate family. I can't even imagine what his girls are feeling.
Thanks Dan.
Nov 28, 2011 11:44 am Yeah, I agree, life is tough, and I think in today's society, many people could be dealing with issues they never have before in what amounts to a pretty privileged couple of generations...with increases in joblessness, homelessness, foreclosures, etc...along with that comes guilt, relationship arguments (money problems being the #1 cause of divorce)...and much of this is being forced on a generation or two that have in many cases, had absolutely zero experience dealing with such things.
Regardless, I am not trying to defend the act or support it, it's wrong, but I can't help but be saddened by the thought of what level of despair could lead to it.
:-(
HuePinnipedal Czar (: 3= Member
Since: Apr 11, 2004
Nov 28, 2011 11:52 am Absolutely. I'm sure all of what you mentioned had something to do with it. Very stressful times, are these. Very difficult to be the 'ideal' so many of our generations parents were.
BeerHunterwww.TheLondonProject.caMember
Since: Feb 07, 2005
Nov 28, 2011 12:31 pm Hue, I'm sorry. So very sad and tragic.
HuePinnipedal Czar (: 3= Member
Since: Apr 11, 2004
Nov 28, 2011 12:50 pm Deleted By Hue
HuePinnipedal Czar (: 3= Member
Since: Apr 11, 2004
Nov 28, 2011 02:31 pm Thankyou, BH.
cooloFrisco's Most UnderratedMember
Since: Jan 28, 2003
Nov 29, 2011 03:40 am Hue, I'm really sorry to hear this. My ex girlfriends mother committed suicide (before I met my ex) and it really wrecked the poor girl. It really is a horrible thing to do to people you care about.
HuePinnipedal Czar (: 3= Member
Since: Apr 11, 2004
Nov 29, 2011 09:00 am I agree, coolo. The act is often so abrupt there are always unresolved issues between them and their imediate family, as is the case with Marty as well. It's pretty obvious by the timing of his suicide, that it was his last 'f#%&-you' to the world. That's what steams me. The guy did do quite a bit of damage to his loved ones in life, and his death was no exception. No 'cry for help'... that would not be his style at all. There are alot of details that are pretty much pointless, at this point. He was human, and must've been at the end of his rope. He will be missed. I just pray that his 'new' wife of a bit over a month, does the right thing for his daughters, when it comes to dads stuff/heirlooms. They're the ones bearing the brunt of his heavy deed.
J-botByte-MixerMember
Since: Dec 04, 2007
Nov 29, 2011 08:00 pm Condolences from me too, Hue. Having lost friends in such a short period of time must have hit pretty hard. Glad you're getting it out of your system though. Keeping that kind of stuff bottled up ain't good.
Eventually, you'll not just remember the tragic events, but you'll start to remember the good times too, and all the other memories of your friends, and you'll carry 'em in your heart, and be saying "These were my friends, and I'm proud to have known them." Er, or something like that anyway.
Take care of yourself man. :)
HuePinnipedal Czar (: 3= Member
Since: Apr 11, 2004
Nov 29, 2011 09:29 pm Quite wise words, J-bot... Thanks for the condolences, as well.
'He was a man, and I shall not look upon his kind again', as it goes... the best any can hope for, after the fact.
Peace to all... and, thanks to each of you.
(: 3=
CptTrippsCzar of Turd PolishMember
Since: Jun 20, 2006
Dec 01, 2011 03:12 pm Sorry to hear that Hue. My best friend committed suicide in my mid 20's. Left behind two kids as well, as bad as life gets I cannot imagine leaving my girls behind and not being around to guide/teach/protect/love them :(
HuePinnipedal Czar (: 3= Member
Since: Apr 11, 2004
Dec 02, 2011 09:52 am Thankyou Cap'n. Sorry to hear of your friend, as well. Dealing with something like this when you're in your 20s must have been incredibly difficult, and leaving children behind in this way is just so incredibly unfair to them. It's bad enough when it happens naturally, but asking a kid to wrap their head around something like this...
His funeral is today. I hope they find some peace after everything is said and done.
BeerHunterwww.TheLondonProject.caMember
Since: Feb 07, 2005
Dec 02, 2011 11:59 am Quote:
His funeral is today. I hope they find some peace after everything is said and done.
This will help a lot with the healing process. I know that the healing cannot truly begin until after this day.
I wish you well
HuePinnipedal Czar (: 3= Member
Since: Apr 11, 2004
Dec 02, 2011 05:52 pm Thanks for your condolences, guys. They are very much appreciated.
The funeral was pretty much terrible, between the widow leaving out pictures of his actual kids in his pictorial-memorial, to carrying his cremated remains around herself for most of the ordeal. Uhg... just pisses me off even more. Some people... jus' makes me sick to consider what that woman is made of.
